Losing Your Memory
by myowndragon
Summary: Set after 2x04 Meat. Ianto has enough of feeling second choice and takes Retcon to forget about Jack. What will Jack do when he finds out his lover has Retconned himself.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey everyone,**

**This is something I came up with a few days ago when a was sitting in the train. This is my first Torchwood fanfic and I haven't got a beta so I take full responsibility for any mistakes. **

**The title is from the song Losing your Memory from Ryan Star. This isn't a songfic but I came up with this story listening to this song and I thought it was a good name for the story. ****Please let me know what you think.**

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_"I wouldn't know anything different."_

_"I would."_

The words kept replaying in Ianto's head as he drove back home. He had always known that he was Jack's second choice, but never had Jack made it so obvious as tonight. Ianto had known from the beginning that he was just Jack's part time shag. He sometimes made himself believe that he was something more than that, and Jack had sometimes pretended that he loved Ianto as well. That was why he had shot Owen all those months ago. He liked to make himself believe that he meant something more to Jack. When Owen had called him a part time shag it had pierced the bubble of his make believe world where he and jack were something more than just fuck buddies. Jack had always helped Ianto believe it. Like the night before they had sent Tommy back. Jack had even told Ianto that he loved him, in a roundabout way.

_"None of you have any partners outside of this."_

She was right.

Sweet Toshiko in love with an alien who was using her, a frozen soldier who had to be sent back to his own time to save the world and of course Owen. Owen who was blind for Tosh's love for him because he was still grieving for Katie.

Jack obviously didn't have anyone either. Sure, he loved Gwen and he shagged Ianto but he didn't really have a partner.

Ianto himself, well he would make sure that after tonight he wouldn't even have a make belief world where he and Jack were together.

When he had started at Torchwood 3 Ianto had come up with a plan b. Originally it was an escape plan in case things went wrong with Lisa and he had to flee. When things had gone wrong and he had been suspended he had almost used it. But at the time Jack had helped him through everything. He had never told Jack about his escape plan. Something he was very grateful for now.

_"I wouldn't know anything different."_

Yes, she wouldn't have known anything different and neither would Ianto after tonight.

Ianto pulled up in front of his house. When he stepped out the car he saw his neighbor Mrs. Jenkins looking out the window. He waved at her. Mrs. Jenkins was always looking after him. During his suspension she had come over a number of times to see how he was doing. Of course she didn't know that he was suspended from his work because he had hidden his half human, half evil, alien, metal girlfriend in the secret base where he worked. He had told her that he had a nasty stomach bug.

When Ianto stepped through the front door he immediately went to the cabinet in the spare room to get out what he needed. When he and Jack had started see… fooling around he had put everything in the spare room. The spare room was the one place where jack never had to go to. He put a couple of clothes and toiletries in a weekend bag and put everything from the escape plan in a back pack.

Ianto couldn't just leave Torchwood without writing goodbye. They were his family after all. Ianto ended up writing 6 letters. Each member of the team got their own letter, 1 letter of resignation and 1 letter for the team in general so that they could do Ianto's chores now that he was gone. He put the letters with his dairy on the kitchen table and left the house.

When Ianto had invented the escape plan he had bought a small flat in Newport. The only flaw in the plan was that he wasn't able to use able to use his car now because the team would be able to track it. He would have to walk and use public transport.

When Ianto arrived at the flat he checked if everything was ready.

Food in the fridge X

Gas X

Electricity X

Warm water X

New car X

Putting a fake diary with the story he had come up with on the table in the living room, Ianto went to the kitchen to get a glass of water. He sat down on the sofa and took out the bottle which contained a couple of Retcon pills. When they rolled out of the bottle into his hand the little white pills looked really innocent, but he knew that as soon as he swallowed them down he would forget the last three years. He would forget Torchwood 3 and 1, he would forget Lisa and Jack. He put the pills in his mouth and flushed them away with water. "I'm sorry, Jack." He thought when started to get drowsy. He pictured Jack in his minds-eye when he fell asleep. Subconsciously trying to hold on to Jack for as long as possible.

_"I wouldn't know anything different."_

_"I would."_

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In another part of Cardiff Captain Jack Harkness was thinking about everything that had happened today. He looked up from the CCTV monitor he had been starring at for the last two hours. "Ianto!" Jack called across the main part of the hub. There was no answer. He activated his comm and called again. "Ianto, are you ready to go home?" when Ianto didn't answer again, Jack turned back to the CCTV monitor to see if he could find him there. Ianto wasn't on any of the monitors and Jack went over to his computer to check the CCTV footage from the last two hours. When he found what he was looking for he saw Ianto leaving the hub and going to his car to go home. 'why didn't he tell me he was going home? I could have gone with him.' Jack thought as he walked to his bunker. 'I'll ask him tomorrow.' God, he really didn't want to think about tomorrow. Tomorrow Gwen would be back and he really didn't want to deal with her smug attitude about the fact that he had agreed not to Retcon Rhys.

_"None of you have any partners outside of this."_

"But we understand how you feel."

Jack could most certainly understand how Gwen felt. His partner might not be outside Torchwood, but that didn't make Ianto any less important. Ianto was definitely Jack's partner and Jack lo… cared a lot about him.

_"I will see you tomorrow."_

Jack fell asleep not knowing that tomorrow would be too late to talk to Ianto. Tomorrow Ianto would be gone.

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**So what did you guys think? Good or Bad? please leave a review to let me know. ****Thank you.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow thank you all so much! 14 reviews, 29 followers and 10 favourites. I never thought that so many people would actually be interested in this. **

**A big thank you to angstosaur for pointing out a typo. I've changed it now.**

**Thank you all for the nice reviews. I just couldn't stop smiling every time I read them. **

**Anyway, here is the next chapter. I hope you guys like it. I still haven't got a beta so, again, all the mistakes are mine.**

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When Toshiko woke up she immediately felt an headache coming up. Last night had been horrible, seeing Gwen standing up to Jack like that. Showing how much better she was. However, the worst had been to see Ianto. He had seen last night how the man he loved was wrapped around Gwen's little finger. Jack always let Gwen go away with everything. She suspected that jack would even let Gwen go away with bloody murder.

"Jack better solved this problem with Ianto last night." Tosh mumbled. If he hadn't then there would be a hell to pay for him. Jack might be her boss and she looked up to him, but Ianto was like a younger brother to her. And, like a lot of big sisters, Toshiko was very protective over Ianto. He had been through too much in his short life already. He had been at the battle of canary wharf, a few months later the whole debacle with Lisa and then he had fallen for Jack who had gone missing a couple of months later. Later they'd found out that Jack had left on his accord. Ianto had been devastated when they had discovered that. Ianto hadn't shown it during working hours, and if he did then he had made sure that nobody had been there to see it.

But Tosh had spent some nights over at Ianto's. Nights where they had complained to each other about the other team members, and in particularly Jack. During those nights Ianto let everything go. They would just get some beer and talk to each other. Most of the time they didn't get drunk, just a little tipsy. Ianto would tell her about his, by lack of a better word, relationship with Jack. At the end of the evening they would be too tired to go back to their own home, so Ianto would spent to night at Tosh's or Tosh would stay at Ianto's.

"Jack you better start treating him like he deserves or I'll be very tempted to remove some of your favourite body parts." Tosh knew that she would never be able to do that, she wasn't that cruel. However, she would be able to put a nasty virus on Jack's computer, and the vision of Jack stressing because his computer wasn't working after a bad night with Ianto put a smile on Tosh's face.

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When Jack climbed out of is bunker into his office he was surprised he wasn't greeted by the smell of fresh coffee. 'Weird normally Ianto would have already made some by now.' He thought while checking his watch. It was 8 o'clock, not that Ianto was late but normally Ianto would start at half past 7.

Tosh came through the cogwheel at half past 8. "Where is Ianto?" She asked as soon as she saw Jack, noticing the absent smell of coffee.

"I haven't seen him yet. Maybe he was really tired last night and is sleeping in."

"After last night I can't blame him." She said whilst glaring at Jack. Beside the glare Jack noticed there was an edge in Tosh's tone. He knew she was very protective over Ianto, but he had no idea what he had done to deserve it this time.

Gwen came in at quarter past 9 and Owen 15 minutes later at half past 9. By now Jack was starting to get worried. He kept glancing at the cogwheel. At quarter to 10 Jack decided that he had waited long enough. He picked up the phone and dialled Ianto's number. The phone went over a couple of times but Ianto didn't answer. After he had tried to call Ianto a few more times he walked over to Tosh's desk.

"Have you heard anything from Ianto?"

"No. shouldn't you be the one to know if there was something going on?" The Japanese woman asked.

"Yeah, I suppose." Jack answered, getting uncomfortable. Tosh was again looking at him in a way that suggested that he had done something wrong and he had to find a way to make it up to Ianto. In the end Tosh took pity on the captain in front of her.

"You know what? If he isn't here at half past 10 why don't you go to his place to see if there's anything wrong?" She said even though she already knew what could possibly be the problem. She wouldn't want to face the man she loved either after he had let her known how little she mattered to him in comparison to someone else.

"Yeah, thank you Toshiko." Jack said. Relieved he went back to his office, knowing that if Ianto didn't show up or let anything know he would at least go to his house in about half an hour to see if he was okay.

The next 30 minutes were agony for Jack. He just couldn't stop picturing all the different scenarios of what could have happened for Ianto to be this late without letting Jack know. At half past 10, Jack put on his coat and left the hub.

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In Newport a young man named Ianto Jones woke up. "Where on earth am I?" He asked all confused.

The last thing he remembered was going out with a couple of friends after a difficult day at uni. He was lying down on the sofa in someone's living room, the living room didn't look familiar at all.

'I'm not the type for a one night stand.' He thought, and if this was a one night stand he seriously doubted he would have woken up on the sofa.

He hadn't heard anyone yet, but he thought it was highly unlikely he was here on his own. After all you don't really leave a stranger on his own in your flat and he was absolutely certain this wasn't one of his mate's flat.

He stood up and walked around the apartment in search of the bathroom. After he had found the bathroom, he emptied his bladder and washed his hands.

"What the hell!" He exclaimed, looking in the mirror.

The face staring back at him was his own face but a couple of years older than the last time he had seen his own reflection, and he was pretty certain he had looked in the mirror yesterday. The guy looking back at him was around 25 years old while yesterday he was 21 years old.

In shock he walked back to the living room. He sat back down on the sofa and stared to some point in from of him, feeling completely lost. After 5 minutes he noticed there was an envelope on the table in front of him.

**Open in case of severe amnesia**

He picked it up and took the letter out.

"Well, let's see that this is all about." He said and started reading.

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**How is Jack going to react when he finds out that Ianto has gone? Please let me know what you thoughts are on this chapter. Have a lovely day.**


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